would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Randomize
