i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize