What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Randomize
