What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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