when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize