im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
God, I missed his penis.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
