Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
stop calling my apartment porn island.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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