I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
