Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
ttyl tear gas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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