but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
