There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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