the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize