I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
