Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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