with your own penis?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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