Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
