eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
