Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
