If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
where are you?
Hypothermia
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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