I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
