We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
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he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
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I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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