her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
