wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
