KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
