it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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