I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize