the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
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