I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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