Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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