Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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