I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
