does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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