I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
