I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
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