Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
