I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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