My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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