When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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