You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
only you would photoshop your dick
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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