My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
it glows. i had to have it.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
