Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
