she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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