Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
