And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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