is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
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