We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
