At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
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