seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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