I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
