I'm drive I can fine osifer
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
