Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
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